While I’m not a big fan of holidays in general (they often feel a little forced to me) I actually love the turning over of the calendar every year – it makes things feel fresh, which is especially needed in winter, even one as sunny and dry as the one we’re currently getting in the Bay Area. That said – how is it 2014 already? (really, can someone please explain to me where exactly last year went?)

2013 was wonderful in a kind of crazy way – I bought a house, moved the business (and myself) into it, started writing a regular column, expanded the team, expanded the business to LA and started driving down there monthly, lived through a six+ week bathroom remodel (in a one bathroom house), celebrated turning 30 by having 75 people to my house for brunch, hosted Thanksgiving for the first time, and planned what will probably be the last big party ever at my parents’ current house (they’re planning on moving in the spring.) Not to mention personally coordinating 26 weddings, throwing big birthday parties for both my best friend and my mom, and somehow maintaining a fairly active social life (if you’re wondering, the thing that gets lost in the schedule is sleep.)

In 2014 I’m hoping to slow down, at least a little bit. More dinner parties and less take-out eaten in front of the computer at 10pm, more coffee in ceramic cups consumed while sitting with people I enjoy and less to-go cups in the car, more walking slowly through neighborhoods and museums and parks and less rushing to back-to-back-to-back appointments, more mornings reading books in bed and less nights answering emails until 2am. I adore my job, and when you love your job and run… slightly towards the high-energy side (ha!), it’s very very easy to slip into workaholism. We have 44 weddings on the books already for 2014 and are taking 50 total this year, and sometimes that makes slowing down feel impossible, but then I remind myself that I have an incredible staff who handle everything given to them beautifully. And that I once did 32 weddings in a year by myself, so 50 between three people is actually really, really manageable. We have so, so many amazing clients this year that I’m pretty much pinching myself constantly – most of the time I can’t believe how lucky I am to get to do work that feels meaningful, keeps me engaged and challenged, and continually connects me to some of the best people (both clients and colleagues) I’ve ever had the pleasure of being around. But I also know that the schedule I’ve been keeping for the last few years isn’t sustainable in the long run, and that if I want to keep adoring my job I need to figure out a way to find some balance. It turns out that I’m not sure that I’m someone who actually likes vacations – after more than 2 or 3 days of not working at all I’m itchy to get back, but I do love half days off, and even whole days here and there, and that occasionally a week or two of a reduced work schedule is lovely (yes, I know how bad it sounds that I essentially just said I rarely take whole days off. It’s true. and I’m working on it!)

We’re kicking weddings things off super early this year with a New Year’s Day wedding (take a look a look my Instagram later today for pictures) and then get another short break before things get busy in February. And, if you’ve been paying attention, then yes! We do still have 30+ weddings from 2013 to blog, and rest assured that Alyssa and I are getting on that stat in the New Year, and I promise not to let it happen again this year…

Wishing you all love and joy and the space to slow down in 2014!

This weekend is my first one completely off (no weddings, no meetings, no site visits, nothing) since early March, so I’m heading to the beach to catch up on some sleep, some socializing, and some sunshine (although I may be planning to shoot a tutorial on signature cocktails, so it’s not like my workaholic tendencies have completely disappeared.)

Some things I’ve liked around the internet lately:

• Kathy Ebel’s amazing blog Fatherland: There’s No Place Like Home or, How and Why a Nice Jewish Girl Asked Germany to Take Her Back - some of the most engaging blogging I’ve read in years (I devoured the entire thing over a few days.)
• Our Feel-Good War on Breast Cancer – Peggy Orenstein is a national treasure, and one of the sanest voices out there on this topic.
• A wedding RSVP card that covers every horrible wedding guest that could possibly be invited.
• I inherited my grandmother’s diamond engagement ring and love it, but also love this piece from Business Insider “Diamonds Are A Sham And It’s Time We Stop Getting Engaged With Them“
• “There’s just some special sauce here that’s pretty nice.” Stranger than Paradise – The NYT tries to write about West Marin.

And: Lowe House Events is now on Facebook! “Like” us over there for more regular updates on goings on in our wedding world.

Here’s to summer weekends and the Pacific Ocean.

photo: polaroid by me, circa 2002, of the road over Mt Tamalpais.

Summer is by far my favorite time of year – somehow it makes everything feel more possible. Of course, summer also means busy season when you work in the wedding industry, and so I tend to spend it working overtime, last year to such a degree that I ended up feeling like I missed it completely. I’m thankful this summer that I get to work in a house with almost floor-to-ceiling windows, and a backyard that I can move to when I need to take a break. The smell of tomato leaves and hose water – together, the epitome of summer – will always be my favorite smells in the world, and right now the tiny tomato seedling I planted eight weeks ago is practically bursting out of it’s pot (it helps that I moved to the hottest, sunniest part of Oakland) and is covered in flowers and baby fruit. Plants are such a visual representation of time passing that it can sometimes shock me, and I’m working on letting them remind me to occasionally slow down.

Last week I bought a house.

It’s still pretty surreal. It was a short sale, and I’d been in contract for over six months by the time we closed. It’s small (although feels huge to me), in what people refer to as a “transitional” neighborhood, needs a lot of painting and other cosmetic work, as well as some non-cosmetic work (hello new sewer lateral!) But it has original 1925 wood floors and trim, a meyer lemon tree in the backyard, half of a neighbor’s orange tree hanging over the fence, and a breakfast room and a backyard deck with a view of both of them.

I’m not sure I’ve ever been more excited about anything. And please forgive me if I show up to a meeting with stray paint in my hair.

Forty is the “ruby” anniversary, so we decked out the venue (the Piedmont Community Center, chosen in no small part for the fact that my parents can walk there from their house) in red. My balloon guy brought it with tons of giant red balloons, and a close family friend way outdid herself on the flowers (she’s a corporate VP, but could totally have a second career as a florist, am I right?) But what really made the party were the many, many, many friends & family that came:

Carrot cake (my dad’s favorite) was in order, and inspiration hit me when telling the bakery what to write on it.

My parents were super young (18 & 20) when they got married, so hit their 40th at a place where they still love to go to a great party. As do their friends, as was evidenced by a fantastic dance party backed by two different live bands.

It was an amazing night – I’m so glad that we got to celebrate these two.

photos: the incredible Maddie Eisenhart of Hart & Sol West

And here’s the same plant today, in 2013 (it desperately needs to be repotted, but I’m waiting to do so until I move again this spring):

Time, man. It sneaks up on you.

note: while I’m not terrible at caring for plants, I’m not particularly amazing at it either – this thing is just unkillable. Also, forgive the photo quality, while I eventually found my camera after moving, I have yet to find its battery charger.

oh hey! Things have been crazy lately – wedding season wrapped up for the year, I took my first non-working vacation in two years, friends have had babies who have needed to be adored (holding babies: one of my favorite things), and I moved (locally. pictured above). I have tons of good 2012 weddings to catch up on blogging, but in the meantime, a few things I’ve liked lately.

• 6 Things You Cannot Change “Better to be the happy, gently smiling sloth than the lemur who has developed a prescription pill habit to keep up with the snowballing disappointments of a life he/she did not choose. Be the sloth, not the crazy-eyed lemur. You’ll be happier. I promise”
• I am really into this coffee table. Now to find an extra $1000 somewhere…
• While I’m obviously a really big fan of weddings, this APW post on Why (Sometimes) Wedding Planning Isn’t Worth It is fantastic.
• I’m still in purging mode from moving, so these decluttering tips that Leslie put together are on my mind.
• Remains of the Day: A wedding photographer sets out to learn what happened to the couples who hired him for their big day from the Washingtonian

Hope that everyone is doing well!

So much joy.

They got married on Friday at the Manhattan City Clerks office, the two packs of poloroids I took are the “official” ceremony photos (a photographer friend of theirs took photos at the reception the next day.) And you know, we ended up with the pre-stated goal, which was one photo worth framing (actually, there are a bunch – about 12 of the 16 are worth framing.) Congratulations again you two. I am so, so happy to have you both in my life.

I got back last night from spending the holiday weekend (after doing a Friday wedding) at my family’s beach house, with a group of friends both old and new, from many different walks of my life. I didn’t even realize how much I needed the break – both from work, and from how intense this summer has been personally – until I was driving home, my hair still smelling faintly of bonfire from the night before, sand mixing into the already-total dirtiness that is my car mid-wedding-season. This beach, more than anywhere else, has always been able to make me feel lighter, and it was especially noticeable this weekend, especially noticeable after the extreme heaviness of the last few weeks.

But despite how hard things have been at times recently, they have also really allowed me to appreciate how lucky I am, as hard things are wont to do. Lucky that I have a job that I truly adore, doing work that feels meaningful; that I have some of the most amazing, most incredible friends in the world, people who help lift me up when I cannot do it by myself; and that I have a family who is able to support each other as best as we know how through unbelievably awful things happening.

The quote referenced in the title and photo on this post is from a 2009 essay by Marget Gunther for the New York Times, and reads in full:

“It doesn’t seem fair that we can look back and connect the dots in life, and see what led from that to this, but we cannot look forward and anticipate in any way what constellation today’s dots will form in the vast space ahead of us. I guess it’s just best to assume that heaven is right here, right now, and let the stars fall where they may.”

I wrote it down three and a half years ago when I first saw it, and it came back into my head last night, driving across a bridge with the windows down. The space ahead is always vast, and, try as we might, we can’t line up the dots. So remember to feel lucky, and to always tell people that you love them.

(also, if I owe you an email, look for it in the next week, I’m finally getting caught up.)

It’s summer! Which is both my favorite time of year (I start waiting for it to roll around again the second it ends every year) and my busiest time of year. I have so many good weddings coming up in the next five months that I can’t wait. In the meantime, some miscellany:

• loved this: 27 ways to be an (even) better person & practically levitate with awesomery. (via Emilia)
• Why the f*ck do I need a Wedding Planner? read my answer over on East Side Bride.
• wondering what’s going on with the growth of my business these days? I wrote about it over on A Practical Wedding last month.
• And speaking of APW, the entire DIY series I did with them has been published, you can see some outtake photos here, as well as links to all of the projects (bouquets! centerpieces! veils! and more.)
• My friend Terrence Brewer‘s new band Citizen Rythm released their new CD this week and it’s excellent – as was the release show at Yoshi’s (always one of my favorite clubs.)
• I’m kind of in love with the wedding dress from these photos that Christy posted yesterday
• I’ll do my own post on it soon, but Allison put up photos from Sophie & Ouma’s wedding in May this morning, and they’re gorgeous.
• A client sent me this talk by Jonah Lehrer on Creativity and it’s very worth listening to.
• digging these “All’s Well” Earrings from Erica Weiss. We may be happy yet indeed.

photos: from my Instagram feed, just a few of my favorite things about summer: baseball, layer cake eaten outdoors, homemade pasta, cherries, neon nailpolish too bright to photograph, pony farms