on finding joy

Oh my, have I had a week. This past Sunday was a dear friend’s wedding, which was the culmination of 14 months of planning work for me, and it was fantastic. Because it was so wonderful, and because I had been on a major adrenaline high for most of the day, Monday was, well, less wonderful. I often get a little sad when the weddings I work on are over, because both the planning process and the event itself are so much fun, and because it means that I won’t get to work with those clients anymore. (yes, I realize how lucky I am to have found a career that I love so much. And yes, I do stay friends with many of my clients.)

The post-wedding adrenaline-crash combined itself with a lot of work and some general (not work related) life-questioning, into what was starting to feel like a perfect storm of overwhelmedness.  And I have learned that when that happens, there’s nothing to do but take a deep breath, call a good friend, and work really hard to be kind to myself.

I happen to be an incredibly social extrovert with workaholic tendencies who runs my own business, but I know that I’m not alone in finding it very easy to put everyone else’s needs first – clients, family, friends. But as I tried to nap on Monday (I always take the day after a wedding off, because I’m usually too tired to even pretend to be efficient) I realized that I’ve been going too hard, and needed to re-focus on being a little kinder to myself. Which for me translates into doing something that will bring me joy, doing something just because it’s what I want to do, not because of what it’s going to do for me. Because joy is one of the few things you can never have too much of, and I’m not as good as I’d like to be about remembering that. And I have discovered that joy can come in many forms – going out of my way to get really good iced coffee while running errands, taking long showers in the middle of the day, staying up too late while drinking too much champagne with good friends, or eating fruit and yogurt for dinner with a glass of wine on the back porch in my bathrobe.

So, here’s to joy, and to the weekend, and to another wedding this Sunday.

posted in my life, wedding


  1. Posted June 20, 2011 at 14:13 | Permalink

    I loved this whole post and all your things that bring joy. Esp your dinner on the porch with yogurt & a glass of wine and your bathrobe:-)

    • elizabeth
      Posted June 21, 2011 at 15:05 | Permalink

      thank you dear! someday I plan to make it out to your place in Marrakech, as I heavily suspect that will be something that will entail a whole lot of joy :)

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  • By Yes on July 1, 2011 at 15:43

    [...] up with old friends and hang out with new ones, working to find the time to fit a little bit of joy into every single day, even the ones where I end up working for twelve hours (luckily I have [...]